Thursday, February 09, 2006

Men's Guide To Dealing With PMS

The Hormone Hostage knows that there are days in the
month when all a man has to do is open his mouth and
he takes his very life into his own hands! This is a
handy guide that should be as common as a driver's
license in the wallet of every husband, boyfriend, or
significant other!!

DANGEROUS: What's for dinner?
SAFER: Can I help you with dinner?
SAFEST: Where would you like to go for dinner?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Are you wearing that?
SAFER: Gee, you look good in brown.
SAFEST: WOW! Look at you!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What are you so worked up about?
SAFER: What did I do wrong?
SAFEST: Here's fifty dollars.
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: Should you be eating that?
SAFER: You know, there are a lot of apples left.
SAFEST: Can I get you a glass of wine with that?
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some chocolate.

DANGEROUS: What did you do all day?
SAFER: I hope you didn't overdo it today.
SAFEST: I've always loved you in that robe!
ULTRASAFE: Here, have some more chocolate.

13 Things PMS Stands For:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff...... ..And my favorite one...
13. Potential Murder Suspect

Pass this onto all of your hormonal friends and those
who might need a good laugh! Or men who need a
warning! And remember: Money talks...but chocolate
sings.

Another thing to giggle about... My husband, not happy
with my mood swings, bought me a mood ring the other
day so he would be able to monitor my moods. When I'm
in a good mood, it turns green. When I'm in a bad
mood, it leaves a big red mark on his forehead. Maybe
next time he'll buy me diamonds.

Here have some chocolate.


Author Unknown


2 comments:

DayByDay4-2Day said...

With that I think I'll go eat a hershey bar!

Lynn said...

That was awesome stuff. Thank-you for posting it. HAHAHA! And yes, chocolate it the best answer of all.

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