Tuesday, December 27, 2005

New Associates Degree for Men

New Associates Degree for Men

For those of you who are married, were married, or are contemplating
marriage - under the assumption that men need (or ought) to be trained
for marriage.

Southwest Tech is offering a new 2 year associates degree....

TWO YEAR DEGREE: Becoming a Real Man That's right, in just six
mini-mesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn an associates
degree in MA (Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the
program outline.


FIRST YEAR:

Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101 Combating Stupidity
MEN 102 You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103 PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104 We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas

Winter Schedule:
MEN 110 Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111 Understanding the Female Response to getting in at
2AM
MEN 112 Parenting: It Doesn't End with Conception
EAT 100 Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101 Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A What's Hers is Hers

Spring Schedule:
MEN 120 How NOT to Act Like a Buttface When You're Wrong
MEN 121 Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122 YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123 Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C What Was Yours is Hers


SECOND YEAR:

Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101 You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102 Morning Dilemma: If It's Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103 How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201 How to Put the Toilet Seat Down

Winter Schedule:
MEN 210 The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211 How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212 You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213 Honest, You Don't Look Like Tom Cruise or Billy Dee
MEN 230A Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important

Spring Schedule:
MEN 220 Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221 Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222 Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223 Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay

MEN 230B Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2

Course Electives:
EAT 201 Cooking with Tofu
EAT 202 Utilization of Eating Utensils
EAT 203 Burping and Belching Discreetly
MEN 231 Mothers-in-law
MEN 232 Appear to Be Listening
MEN 233 Just Say "Yes, Dear"
ECON 001C Cheaper to Keep Her
(Just a thought for all the women
out there...)


MENtal illness, MENstrual cramps, MENtal breakdown, MENopause,
GUYnocologist (poetic spelling).
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?

Send this to all of the women you know
(and men with a sense of humor)
and brighten their day!!!...
and when we have real trouble, it's a
HISterectomy

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